he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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