Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
