she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
