I love black thongs
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
