My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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