But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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