i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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