It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
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