Where is the hickey?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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