Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
