so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
