I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
