I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
