Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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