It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
