Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Randomize