wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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