ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
How external is "for external use only"?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
