I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Two words: blizzard sex
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
