dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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