O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
