it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
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