We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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