does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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