I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
