its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Too much gin, very little bucket
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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