I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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