The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
