nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
