I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
