I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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