You're completely useless in the revolution.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I have already put on my inside pants.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
