therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
