i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
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