it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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