Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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