I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize