508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
