talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
