Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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