i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
