no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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