Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
