Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Randomize
