Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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