God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
