I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Life is so much better after having sex.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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