Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Randomize
