Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Randomize
