She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
